after the birth

of all three of my youngsters my hormones are a mess for a while.

I am just sad....don't know why...but I am.

babies makes me cry, older kids make me cry, the thought of my children going to college someday makes me cry, the thought of them getting married makes me cry,
kids fighting makes me cry
annoying chilly dog makes me cry
the fact I got an epidural and didn't have a perfect easy natural waterbirth makes me cry
Harvey's blue eyes make me cry
and Eva's big brown eyes make me cry
chicken soup for the mothers soul is like postpartum torture.
the fact danny told me to get the baby out during labor made me cry....but that was until he told me I had the story wrong and I already got the epidural when he said that...I was blaming him for my epidural.

men playing frisbee golf in my backyard even made me cry.

But It's clearing....I can feel it.
soon only the worst of stories will make me cry and I won't have this super sensitive soul. It will be back to normal and I'll remember it again only when I am experiencing it again.

I have to take some credit for Nat's lovely dress. A friend had helped start a wedding dress store and we went to check it out because they were selling off everything. There weren't many dresses there but I kept seeing this one which was a long antiquiey lacey thing and I made her try it on. She ended up buying it and altering it a little and she looked GORGEOUS!
The happy couple couldn't get any cuter.....it reminds me of our wedding 9 years ago from the 7th. We celebrated it this year by bringing home our new baby boy :)

I was only partially present (locked away nursing a 12 day old baby and all) but I did snatch a couple pictures here and there.
my handsome wedding date

here's to many more april anniversaries!

harvey honeymoon

I remember hearing someone say the first two weeks of your baby's life you are on a "babymoon" where you literally fall in love with your new child. My hormones are baby love raging. I am weepy with tears of joy for this new nice guy in my life.
isn't he the most handsome thing you've ever seen?
he was sooooo worth it!
mommy + harvey = truuuuuue loooooove

Harveys birthday

was on Easter. I thought the moment would never come. I swore I'd have to be induced....but then at 12:00 I woke with contractions. It's like a bell rang or an alarm went off in my body or something....could ve range earlier that's for sure. At first I thought the alarm was just telling me I forgot to put out the Easter baskets for the girls. So I attended to that first. But then it was unmistakable labor. I couldn't sleep....so I read. I read until 6:00 when it felt like my water broke. i woke up Danny, called my mom and dad, and the girls woke up and immediately found their baskets. On the way to the hospital we passed by a prostitute I think and hit every pot hole and that really hurt. I was sure I was probably totally dilated, ready to push, pretty much done with labor. So I got there and I was only a 5. So we walked around, laughed at the nurses while they tried to blow up the humongous inflatable birthing tub thingy, I took a bath and read a wimpy kid book, bounced on the ball.....tried all my tricks. Still no Harvey. So around 3 o clock I had my midwife check me and I was still only a 7. So I kept at it...I went in my huge inflatable tub and I started to feel like maybe this was going to be a really long night. So I got the epidural. Which turned into a spinal and now I have a killer headache. but anyways.....that was around 5 or 6. I was getting really tired. Harvey wasn't moving down...he was floating up high. I can't really remember what happened for the next three hours. At 9 o clock I was totally dialated but he was still really high and they couldn't get him going south. Luckily the Dr. who delivered Addie and Eva was there and he came to save my midwife who was pretty much out of ideas. He helped me out with the vacuum and around 11:15 Harvey Daniel was born with a huge ball on his head from being sucked out and a knot in his cord. As he was emerging everyone was yelling "HE"S HUGE!!" so instead of me holding him and loving on him...I got to hold him for a second, and I wondered if he could open his eyes enough to see...he had alot of fat on his face. Everyone swept him off to the scale to check this enormous baby's weight and he was 12 lbs 1 ounce!!! I could not believe it. OUCH. He was the biggest baby my dr. had ever delivered. So I (with my sore abused body) got the prize of largest baby. And that prize is extremely sweet. He is a mellow man...I kinda got that feeling during delivery. He had a long pretty torturous labor and he was like perfectly stable, with no meconium, and when they pulled him out after 2 hours of pushing he didn't cry, he just grunted like he was slightly annoyed. So here is the little man who has stolen my heart and Danny said he's not jealous at all because he's in love too. now just to recover from it all....

I decided to add something to this a full 22 months later.  Giving birth to such a beautiful, big boy was truly one of the joys and prides of my life.  I did use hypnobirthing with Harvey and I think it was one of the reasons I was able to feel so calm and relaxed throughout labor.  Recovery was no harder with him then with the girls.  One of the cool things was how he slept.  He slept 20 out of 24 hours a day for like the first three months.  And for the four hours he was awake he was all smiles and sweetness.  He still is a relaxed, healthy, sweet almost 2 year old.  And he is still big but not enormous.  About 30 pounds.  I regretted for a while that I didn't get the totally unmedicated waterbirth I had with Eva,(she was 9 pounds) but have come to peace with it and feel the epidural was what I needed at the time to cope with the long, intense, labor. 

laaaabooor

I never wake up at night unless someone is throwing up on me or crying. I guess it's the lot of an exhausted pregnant woman that Nothing will wake you up except tragedy.
BUT I think my newest puker might be coming soon.
It's almost 1 and I've had some pretty good contractions...
so now I'm going through my music and gathering a book to read and writing down every important number.
oh and don't forget makeup, hairstuff and a bra. and something to wear home from the hospital.
And a camera.
I think my little boy just really didn't want two extremely sad sisters on Easter since I fell asleep at like 9 and danny went to bed and neither of us remembered to help the easter bunny out. I have to speak in code because some little eyes read my blog.
Anyways......it's been a while since I felt a contraction so I better go back to bed. Maybe the only reason I had them was to get my lazy bod out of bed and finish business.
come on....I want an easter baby!