not suitable for public

Okay so yesterday my goal was for ALL of us (me, Eva, and Addie) to accomplish 3 relatively simple tasks.
GO to storytime.
Pick up Eva's 1 year old pictures at the mall and let the kids play in playland.
Eat lunch.
STORYTIME: They had a sub who was so exuberent and energetic she read about 15 books. All the kids were screaming by the end of it. I then had to pay my late fee (which I was annoyed about because they never emailed me about it). Eva in the mean time started pulling book after book off of the shelf. I crammed them all back on the shelf. And wheeled the stroller towards the movies. She was like fighting me and arching her back so I quickly grabbed 3 movies and we went to the new "self check out" where I had to throw about 400 kids books on the counter while holding eva in one arm with the stroller falling over and Addie trying to scan them all herself. We left.
MALL: Picked up Eva's pictures and headed to the playland. I was realling hoping it wouldn't be WWF crowded toddler wrestling style but it was. Eva was crawling across the ground when a 40 lb 3 year old raced into her and she went flying. She was screaming so loud I ran over to her and picked her up and she had a mouth full of blood. It was like dripping all over her shirt. I kinda freaked because I thought she knocked out her front tooth that she just grew in. After we cleared out the blood I realized it was just a slice through her lip. That was good but I was annoyed the mom of that kid watched the whole thing and didn't even say anything. I was shooting her looks of death. We left and went to see the puppies.
Lunch: BURGER KING drive thru. uneventful.
Anyways, today Addie claims she wants to "get out of the house" but I'm really doubting the wisdom in that choice. I'm thinking we should just stay in a padded room.

uncrafty

Hey sisters/friends
I always hated crafts as a child. If someone got out glue and scizzors at school I always groaned and felt so annoyed that I was going to be "forced" to make a preplanned owl, or weird looking parrot or whatever. I prided myself in not being crafty, I was artsy which was totally different and much superior. I continued this tradition through my school years. As "artsy" as I was I was definately not CRAFTY. I never took home ec because cooking/crafting weird quilted backpacks was totally not my thing. My senior year I took a class called child development or something because I had a free period. We had to take care of a "baby think it over" which is essentially a really ugly baby doll that cries a ton and you have to turn a key to get it to stop crying. Unfortunately you have to turn the key for like an hour. A little computer inside the baby records what you are doing, wether you are neglecting it, abusing it, feeding it, banging it against a cement wall. Anyways, I swear I did not abuse the "baby think it over" but somehow I got a 50% on that assignment. And I still believe I got a 50% because everyone CLAIMED I hung it from a tree or something horrible. NOT TRUE! anyways,
Now only less than ten years later I am a functioning non abusive mother of two children.
I'm really truly not crafty like my sisters are. But I will add I learned how to use a sewing maching from Danny (who did take home ec) and I sewed Addie a scripture case. Quilted ( I bow my head in shame) and I have been knitting/crocheting since my freshmen year of college.
I guess I've realized how being artsy/crafty can actually intersect and wether I'm painting some funky painting, or knitting a crazy hat I'm still creating something. And usually I feel good about it while I'm making it even if it does make me laugh at myself and think "IF only my 15 year old self could see me now!"

naughty noo noo

Ever since I've become a "mom" I've totally gotten into the horribly embarassing habit of saying things with made up words or in babyspeak. Like our family word for head is "nut". I don't know why. So the other day a little boy at church hit his head on the corner of the wall and his mom started to comfort him. I was walking by and I was like..."uhoh don't crack your nut!" She looked at me like I was a little loopy. I of course started giggling and said "Oh that's what we always call "Head" We call it a "nut" . She seemed confused a bit.

Addie has become the family photographer and she uses my camera all the time when I don't know about it. I was just going through old pictures and deleting them when I saw this scene that her and Eva did together. Slightly freaky and I'm wondering how many hair stretchies were swallowed and actually went through her system.

In Hiding

Hey everyone,

SO this month has been crazy for us. We decided to rent our house out, and found renters fast. We closed on our house in one frantic week, the same week we were packing up and trying to get out so our renters could get in. I had only like one or two moments of mental breakdown.

We are now in hiding at my parents house.

I feel like we are in hiding because no one has been able to call us because our cell phone only works some of the time, and our home phone is obsolete.

Danny has been working frantically on our new house.

Our new house could be put in a magazine as a monument to the 60's.

Wood paneling, pink and blue toilets and sinks, gold flecked counters. It's great.

Since he has been so busy with it we haven't really seen much of him since we moved.

So today I'm in hiding to the extreme. It's Sunday and he's not working on it today.

I just locked myself into my old bedroom and am hiding from my children because they have been latched to me like 2 growths (cute growths) coming out of the side of my body. They have been sick a bit, and there's been alot of uprooting and such, but I felt like they were literally draining my life force out of me and soon I was just going to be a puddle of mommy mud with a little flag stuck in it that says "Mommy".

That made me think about how we never had door locks on our doors in our old house.

We absolutely definately need locks on our doors. I'll put that on the list for Danny. For your own viewing enjoyment try....

www.icanhascheezburger.com

primary program

Hey everyone.

So tomorrow is the primary program and I have to sit with the sunbeams through the whole grueling 45 minute event. I always feel a little like I'm still 3 years old and just extremely gigantic. Addie has 2 lines that she has practiced alot. She says them from memory with extreme voice inflection .

Tonight we were playing telephone....it went from Danny to Addie to Me to Eva to chilly.

Eva and chilly were the weakest links of our telephone chain.

I said to Addie, "Hey what if Eva was in the primary program?"

Addie was like "all she can say is 'dog'. "

"True, true".

So the lady who is prompting all the kids on their parts will say, "I can show love to my mommy."

Eva will say "DOG!"

Then the lady will say "I can show Jesus I love him."

Eva will say "DOG!"

The lady will say, "My family can be together forever."

Eva will say "DOG!"

ect ect. We continued this for so long Danny started to look a little burned out on this whole line of communication.

We started giggling and then Eva started laughing. We are the girls club :)

getting jiggy with halloween

Eva was an expert goop extractor.

Addie thought it felt gross.
Eva thinks leaves taste delicious.

Yep a bunny and an angel. (awwwwww how sweet) there I said it for you :)

Halloween in Dayton is not normal. People decorate for halloween more than they do Christmas. They create seriously morbid porch displays. Our neighbor pulls out the megaphone for 2 hours and makes ghost noises constantly on trick or treat night. Danny's comment tonight was " The thing I hate about halloween is all the alcohol." I was like "Alcohol?"

He said "Yeah I smelled alcohol on a bunch of people while we were out."

I said "Okay ANY HOLIDAY in Dayton, and probably most places in the world revolve around alcohol. Why not halloween too? Heck why not just pour the kids a shot of whiskey instead of a reese cup?"

It is true though that alcohol is front and center in any holiday in dayton.

July 4th..lets stagger around with a brown paper bag with a bottle in it and scare people until they call the police.

halloween..Let's drink beer and then smash the bottles on the sidewalk.

Thanksgiving... Lets drink because we are annoyed we have to see our relatives ect.

St Pattys..Green beer:NO COMMENT.

Tonight we honored whatever halloween is about by making our customary trick or treat candy rounds. Addie was really excited. The problem was the freaky decor started troubling her and she refused to go up to certain doors. There are also very few kids in our neighborhood so we always come back with LOADS of candy because they give her like 10 pieces at every single house.

We got home and sorted all the candy and threw away anything that might pull out any expensive Dental metals (forget the ones in the suspicious packaging that looks like someone injected a drug into it) and threw away those Chic peanut butter whatever the heck they are.

Then we let Eva swim in the candy on a blanket and that was funny. Then she tried to eat the candy in the plastic. So I end another October.

I would tell you all about all the other stuff that's going on but it's too much and anyone who reads this probably already knows :) Love YA

No White after Labor Day

I thought as an ode to this summer, I'd post some of our pics. Teachers' have all Summer off, so everyone continuously told us to go do something exciting. The problem is teachers' don't have money to do anything exciting. All in all though we ended up doing more than just sitting on our duffs eating cheese curls all summer.
ahem ahem.
Danny was a door to door salesmen for all of May-June until he couldn't take it anymore and quit.
We house hunted insanely and put our house on THE MARKET which meant we had to do some much needed maintenance.
We attended 3 weddings for some close friends. Addie was the flower girl in Danny's friends wedding and I was a bridesmaid in my best friend (Amy) from high school's wedding.
We went swimming,at the pool and at Danny's dads.
We went to a family reunion (can you say braunschweiger?)
We had numerous family birthdays, get-togethers, and such.
We did the Zoo and the Darke County Fair. Woweee. Now here are some pics from our Summer of doing NOTHING!